Gaining recognition as a physics person by peers is an important contributor to undergraduate students’ physics identity and their success in physics courses. Previous research has separately demonstrated that women perceive less recognition from peers than men in their physics courses (perceived peer recognition) and that women receive fewer nominations from their peers for being strong in their physics course than men (received peer recognition). The relation between perceived and received peer recognition for men and women, however, is not well understood. Here we test three plausible models for this relation and find that, for students receiving the same amount of recognition from peers as measured from private nominations on a survey, women report significantly lower perceived peer recognition than men. We did this by conducting a quantitative study of over 1,700 students enrolled in introductory physics courses at eight institutions in the United States. We directly compare student gender, perceived peer recognition and received peer recognition, controlling for race and ethnicity, academic year and major, and course-level variability. These findings offer important implications for testable instructional interventions.